I finally started my shots last night (6.5.12)! I had to go into St. John's Hospital yesterday morning to get my progesterone levels tested and everything looked great! My package came in the mail yesterday with all my shots and meds in them. It was really fun opening the box and seeing what the next couple months of my life are going to look like. I of course googled Lupron after starting it last night just to see what opinions I could find from other surrogate moms. The adjectives that I found on different medical websites and blogs were very interesting and some of these moms were pretty funny. It's so so nice for me to see the happy, comical, fun side of surrogacy and of the shots and the before-pregnancy stuff. There's a little bit of a pattern that I started to notice as I was seeing different adjectives. I'll use this word as my example because I found this a lot and I thought it was really cute, half the adjectives I found related to the word b!tchy ;)
Irritated
Hungry
Sweaty
Sleepy
Hot flashes
Forgetting a lot
Bloated
Thirsty!
Unsatisfied
Moody
Weight gain
Constant hunger
OR
Weight loss
No appetite
Mood swings
Weepy
Grumpy
Emotional
Grouchy
Munchies
Trouble sleeping/falling asleep
Sensitive
Prone to overreacting
Nausea
Headaches
B!tchy
This makes me feel like I'm about to turn into the 7 dwarfs... grumpy, sleepy... my poor BD haha what he has to deal with
I did find a COUPLE plus side symptoms to starting the Lupron:
Bigger boobs
Clear face
Haven't noticed any of this happening yet. I also found some good advice on what to do to get through all these nasty feelings:
Drink lots of water!
Gatorade!
Lots of protein
One of my favorites that I found about weight gain on Lupron..." Lupron doesn't make you gain weight. Lupron makes you not be able to control your arm. You see. You will be hungry! Your arm will go directly to the fridge and then place lots of food into your mouth. I totally had this uncontrollable arm disease. Stupid 10 lbs."
And some funny quotes from surrogate mothers that I couldn't pass up :)
"Lupron makes me evil!"
"Lupron is the devil!"
"Can you give everyone advance warning of a Jekyll and Hyde scenario!! LOL!! "
"I DID bloat up like a dang tub o' lard, though, and to be honest I think I would have preferred a few more headaches if it meant my pants fit me!"
"Testy....my family would have been OVERJOYED with "testy"."
"I often hulked out whilest on Lupron"
"It makes me very b!tchy, sleepy, hungry, and gives me massive headaches. It is a very evil drug. I have also gained 4 lbs in the 2 weeks I've been on it. Welcome to the Lupron Loopies!"
Of course, just like every pregnancy and everything else, no two people are the same. So on day 3 (6.7.12), here are the symptoms I've seen so far:
Yesterday may have just been a bad day ha. Day 3, I don't feel so irritable but it's only 8:00 in the morning so we'll see where the day takes me haha! Sorry BD :) However, I did rat out a coworker for some dirty stuff just because I felt like it this morning, so maybe I am irritable haha. I'm hungry today too, which feels great. I'd love to have an appetite for a bit before I get pregnant. God knows once I'm pregnant I'll be eating on that regular schedule again. When I was pregnant, if I didn't eat at 10 in the morning, 10:30 at the LATEST, I turned into a monster.
BD has been giving me the shots so far. I haven't wanted to do it myself. It's nice though, he's been getting up with me in the morning and helping me and I told him yesterday that I would try it so that I don't have to keep bothering him. He told me that's not necessary and he's happy that I have somebody to help me do this part. He said he thinks it's nice that I have somebody by my side during this :) Thanks BD! The first 2 shots didn't phase me, but the one last night and this morning seemed to have a little more tenderness to it. BD said maybe I'm feeling the medicine going in now and that's why I can feel it a little more. And told me to just rub it out a little bit after, which did seem to help. I'm very happy to have him here by my side, don't know if I would even consider doing this without him and his support.
When I got to work yesterday my coworker asked me if I could feel anything, and I didn't notice till I touched it that it was a little tender. I think that is just me getting used to having shots in my stomach. It's kind of cool, as weird as that sounds, to finally be started on the medications. It feels so real. I feel so ready and empowered to get pregnant. I think empowering may be the perfect word. I feel so wonderful that I am able to do this for this family. After meeting so many other surrogate moms, I think it grounded me a little bit, helped me get off cloud nine and realize that this is just a fun thing that I am getting the PRIVALEGE to do. These other moms have all had such great experiences and spoke so highly of doing this, and even doing this multiple times! It's awesome how humble these moms were and how amazing these people's families and journeys are.
So far, the "Lupron Lupies" are a bust. I am feeling pretty great and will just keep progressing!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Happy Mother's Day
I know this should have been posted on Mother's Day...
Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful moms out there. My son and I had a wonderful day. He took his first few steps, for me for mother's day :) What a doll. He had a big smile on his face, he was so excited. He's been watching his sister walk, and I think he figured it's about time for him to start too.
I also wanted to wish a Happy Mother's Day to my IM. She is a wonderful mom already to a 7 year old brilliant little boy. He loves learning new things and putting things together- his favorite is legos. He has such a knack for science already and he LOVES technology. His parents have done such a great job so far, and I know she is totally ready to do it again. I cannot wait to give her that opportunity again. She is so ready for another baby, its going to be such a fun and endearing process and outcome!
I wanted to wish all the other surrogate moms and IPs a Happy Mother's Day as well. This is such an amazing process, and I am so blessed to be doing this. I know all the other people that have been a part of this process feel the same. It's such a great feeling ALL THE TIME. I can't wait to actually be pregnant!!!
Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful moms out there. My son and I had a wonderful day. He took his first few steps, for me for mother's day :) What a doll. He had a big smile on his face, he was so excited. He's been watching his sister walk, and I think he figured it's about time for him to start too.
I also wanted to wish a Happy Mother's Day to my IM. She is a wonderful mom already to a 7 year old brilliant little boy. He loves learning new things and putting things together- his favorite is legos. He has such a knack for science already and he LOVES technology. His parents have done such a great job so far, and I know she is totally ready to do it again. I cannot wait to give her that opportunity again. She is so ready for another baby, its going to be such a fun and endearing process and outcome!
I wanted to wish all the other surrogate moms and IPs a Happy Mother's Day as well. This is such an amazing process, and I am so blessed to be doing this. I know all the other people that have been a part of this process feel the same. It's such a great feeling ALL THE TIME. I can't wait to actually be pregnant!!!
Monday, May 14, 2012
Well thank you Obama, glad you approve ;)
5.14
Found this online. This reminded me of my first IVF appointment with my doctors at the clinic. When they inserted the probe, the first thoughts going through my head were "please don't find a baby already brewing in there", which of course there wasn't. Which was great. For everyone.
Anyways, and disregard my language of explaining this whole process. I definitely do not know the technical terms. The Dr stuck the "probe" up inside, and turned on the tv so I could see a big bright picture of my uterus. He started to inject the "goey stuff", which made a big air bubble inside my uterus. He showed me my overies, and other different parts of my insides that I had never really noticed before. Of course, last time I got an ultrasound, I had my little baby boy in there to see. Without the baby, it was big, vast, and empty! It looked kinda cool though all blown up. And the doctor said I had a very good uterus. Told me my uterus looks great, healed exactly right after having my son, and is definitely ready for another. What a relief to hear. What a relief for the IPs to hear! I wouldn't have minded Obama there, tellin me this. Hey Girl, That is one DAMN FINE uterus you've got there!
Not much to update here- waiting game. Retainer agreement is almost done. I'm hoping to go into my lawyers office Wednesday to sign all the paperwork. After the paperwork, the doctors can send me my package with all my shots and meds! And then waiting till my body is ready to start! Ooo I can't wait to do this. I want to know we are starting!
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Agency vs No Agency vs Lawyers vs....
4.26
This has gotten a little complicated. When I started my journey, I did the research to make sure I knew what I was doing before I picked an agency. I LOVED the agency I picked, out in Maple Grove. They were so caring and helpful and answered all my questions. They helped prepare me to get started, emotionally, making sure I would be able to carry this baby and give the baby up. They, along with my kid's dad, helped me to 100% get to where I know I am an incubator, and that even though I will be giving the baby up, it will stay in my life, because I found the most wonderful family! And they love my mom so much too!
The surrogate family never found complete trust in the agency. They didn't find a reason to spend all the extra money to work with the agency. We also didn't need the agency because we had found each other, and we didn't need the agency to help find a family or find the surrogate. SO after some debate, we decided to boycott the agency and work together and trust each other. We have put a lot of faith and trust in each other. They love my mom so so much, so they have decided to love me the same, knowing I am about to give them one of the two best gifts they've ever gotten. It's nice that we have such faith and trust in each other, and I hope it works.
Now we are going through the process of making sure we have our lawyers. Their lawyer will be there for them the entire time, making sure everything goes smoothly. I had found a lawyer, for the price the surrogate dad had told me to use, which ended up being very high. Its tricky knowing what to look for without an agency, and making sure that I am covered throughout this entire process. I just found a new lawyer, for a much cheaper price, and I don't know much about him. I am waiting to hear back from him so I can see his website and learn more about him. I of course want to save the surrogate family money since I know how expensive of a process this is. I think they are starting to get nervous because they have such doubts in it working. I, on the other hand am so optimistic about it that I don't have doubts. I don't see it not working! But I am hoping that using this cheaper lawyer won't affect how everything goes. The dad continues to remind me that I need to trust him and that they are here for me. And the new lawyer said that he will be there for me the whole time too. I just am excited to see what his agreement says and what his money is covering FOR ME. Once I am pregnant I don't think I will be so nervous about all the technicalities and the contracts, but it is just everything leading up to it. I just want to know that everything will go smoothly!
4.30
Okay so I dropped my old lawyer this morning. They wouldn't move on their price, and the surrogate family's lawyer has worked with him before and said he really should know that he's charging us too much. He just knows that my surrogate family has a lot of money, so he thinks it's ok to charge them more so that "I have appropriate coverage". But my new lawyer is giving me apppropriate coverage as well, so that is bogus. We are paying a FIFTH of the price we were going to pay the other lawyer, and he was throwing around all these words to make ME believe that I needed that much coverage and service. Hopefully this will all be right! I really can't wait till the transfer so that all the nitty-gritty stuff will be done!
5.4
I got my retainer agreement this week and have been going over draft after draft with my lawyer. I read through, asked the questions I needed to ask, then he went through, and told me the information I needed to know. I like this lawyer. I was nervous since his price is so low compared to what we were going to pay, but he has been proving himself. I like what he has to say on his comments- the heads up he's giving me, all the explanations. He's a lawyer, so of course he's not always at his phone or email, but he's been really good at being on time to things that I've asked him for help with and he works nights and weekends! He seems to be pretty good at his job, and devoted to his clients. I'm excited to meet him next week and see his office and what he's about. So far the retainer agreement is going smoothly, and the surrogate family's lawyer is out of town till Monday. Since my lawyer works through the weekend, we can really read everything over, make sure we agree with everything stated, and get it signed next week. Once I get everything signed, I will get my package from my doctor! And then waiting on my body, I can start my pills and shots! Everything is coming together nicely :)
5.8
This seems to be going from complicated to worse! This is getting so frustrating. My advice to anybody wanting to be a surrogate mother- USE AN AGENCY. This is so much work not using an agency. And not using an agency has just gotten me a lot of confusion and frustration, and only $5000 more. Not worth it. The agencies help with health insurance, and with the lawyers, so that the surrogate family and the surrogate mother don't have to do all the work. Instead, we are being swamped with things to do all the time. And I don't think I am being properly compensated by going through all this. We are going as fast as we can to get this document done, and I think the surrogate dad thinks all it needs is a signature, and not for it to be fixed and revised to MY liking, as well as his. He thinks he is "taking good enough care of me" that I will just sign the contract and trust him, but theres a lot on there that if something goes wrong, then it's on us! Not only me! I'm looking out for him too! We had decided not to tell the insurance company just in case they say that since it's not my baby, they don't need to cover. Technically, this is a pregnancy that I am going through, so one would think that it would be covered. I would so much rather be honest about it then having to hide things from my insurance company. What if they cover and then ask me if I need to add my baby to the policy and I don't have one? Or what if half way through the pregnancy, a test comes through that states it's not my child and they get mad that we lied and take it all away? Or make them pay back? And if all the labor isn't covered under my health insurance, that's very expensive!
Just talked to the surrogate dad and he apologized about getting so excited. He is just nervous and he thought our insurance stuff was all taken care of and decision made. Decision was made, but my lawyer just wants to make sure all parties are covered. I guess I should have expected this since we aren't using an agency!!!!
5.17
Signed my agreement yesterday!!! Finally over with! Ha. Now I'm hoping the real stuff will start. No more
This has gotten a little complicated. When I started my journey, I did the research to make sure I knew what I was doing before I picked an agency. I LOVED the agency I picked, out in Maple Grove. They were so caring and helpful and answered all my questions. They helped prepare me to get started, emotionally, making sure I would be able to carry this baby and give the baby up. They, along with my kid's dad, helped me to 100% get to where I know I am an incubator, and that even though I will be giving the baby up, it will stay in my life, because I found the most wonderful family! And they love my mom so much too!
The surrogate family never found complete trust in the agency. They didn't find a reason to spend all the extra money to work with the agency. We also didn't need the agency because we had found each other, and we didn't need the agency to help find a family or find the surrogate. SO after some debate, we decided to boycott the agency and work together and trust each other. We have put a lot of faith and trust in each other. They love my mom so so much, so they have decided to love me the same, knowing I am about to give them one of the two best gifts they've ever gotten. It's nice that we have such faith and trust in each other, and I hope it works.
Now we are going through the process of making sure we have our lawyers. Their lawyer will be there for them the entire time, making sure everything goes smoothly. I had found a lawyer, for the price the surrogate dad had told me to use, which ended up being very high. Its tricky knowing what to look for without an agency, and making sure that I am covered throughout this entire process. I just found a new lawyer, for a much cheaper price, and I don't know much about him. I am waiting to hear back from him so I can see his website and learn more about him. I of course want to save the surrogate family money since I know how expensive of a process this is. I think they are starting to get nervous because they have such doubts in it working. I, on the other hand am so optimistic about it that I don't have doubts. I don't see it not working! But I am hoping that using this cheaper lawyer won't affect how everything goes. The dad continues to remind me that I need to trust him and that they are here for me. And the new lawyer said that he will be there for me the whole time too. I just am excited to see what his agreement says and what his money is covering FOR ME. Once I am pregnant I don't think I will be so nervous about all the technicalities and the contracts, but it is just everything leading up to it. I just want to know that everything will go smoothly!
4.30
Okay so I dropped my old lawyer this morning. They wouldn't move on their price, and the surrogate family's lawyer has worked with him before and said he really should know that he's charging us too much. He just knows that my surrogate family has a lot of money, so he thinks it's ok to charge them more so that "I have appropriate coverage". But my new lawyer is giving me apppropriate coverage as well, so that is bogus. We are paying a FIFTH of the price we were going to pay the other lawyer, and he was throwing around all these words to make ME believe that I needed that much coverage and service. Hopefully this will all be right! I really can't wait till the transfer so that all the nitty-gritty stuff will be done!
5.4
I got my retainer agreement this week and have been going over draft after draft with my lawyer. I read through, asked the questions I needed to ask, then he went through, and told me the information I needed to know. I like this lawyer. I was nervous since his price is so low compared to what we were going to pay, but he has been proving himself. I like what he has to say on his comments- the heads up he's giving me, all the explanations. He's a lawyer, so of course he's not always at his phone or email, but he's been really good at being on time to things that I've asked him for help with and he works nights and weekends! He seems to be pretty good at his job, and devoted to his clients. I'm excited to meet him next week and see his office and what he's about. So far the retainer agreement is going smoothly, and the surrogate family's lawyer is out of town till Monday. Since my lawyer works through the weekend, we can really read everything over, make sure we agree with everything stated, and get it signed next week. Once I get everything signed, I will get my package from my doctor! And then waiting on my body, I can start my pills and shots! Everything is coming together nicely :)
5.8
This seems to be going from complicated to worse! This is getting so frustrating. My advice to anybody wanting to be a surrogate mother- USE AN AGENCY. This is so much work not using an agency. And not using an agency has just gotten me a lot of confusion and frustration, and only $5000 more. Not worth it. The agencies help with health insurance, and with the lawyers, so that the surrogate family and the surrogate mother don't have to do all the work. Instead, we are being swamped with things to do all the time. And I don't think I am being properly compensated by going through all this. We are going as fast as we can to get this document done, and I think the surrogate dad thinks all it needs is a signature, and not for it to be fixed and revised to MY liking, as well as his. He thinks he is "taking good enough care of me" that I will just sign the contract and trust him, but theres a lot on there that if something goes wrong, then it's on us! Not only me! I'm looking out for him too! We had decided not to tell the insurance company just in case they say that since it's not my baby, they don't need to cover. Technically, this is a pregnancy that I am going through, so one would think that it would be covered. I would so much rather be honest about it then having to hide things from my insurance company. What if they cover and then ask me if I need to add my baby to the policy and I don't have one? Or what if half way through the pregnancy, a test comes through that states it's not my child and they get mad that we lied and take it all away? Or make them pay back? And if all the labor isn't covered under my health insurance, that's very expensive!
Just talked to the surrogate dad and he apologized about getting so excited. He is just nervous and he thought our insurance stuff was all taken care of and decision made. Decision was made, but my lawyer just wants to make sure all parties are covered. I guess I should have expected this since we aren't using an agency!!!!
5.17
Signed my agreement yesterday!!! Finally over with! Ha. Now I'm hoping the real stuff will start. No more
Baby boy or girl
4.26
It's crazy to think about maybe, but I want to know what I will end up having! They will implant 2 embryos, and they will both be fertilized so I could have twins! I would love to carry twins. I think it would make the experience that much more exciting. If it's not twins and I am only having one baby, I think I would want to have another boy. "It"s not my baby, but it is a baby that will belong to a friend of mine and a friend of my mothers. I loved carrying a boy and I would love to give them a baby boy to always be my friend. The surrogate mom told me they don't have a godmother in their culture, and they would consider me a godmother to their child. That made me very happy. They are so scared this isn't going to work, and I am so optimistic. There will be 2 fertilized embryos, so I think I will have twins!! If it's a girl, I think it will be exciting for me because I already had a boy. It would be fun to have a girl so I could have another little mini friend to snuggle with when I see her. I know this is going to work. There's no reason for it not to. I'm healthy, I've been eating more and walking more and getting myself ready, and I have at least another month or 2 till I will be having the transfer done. That gives me all that time to gain weight, take my prenatals, and get my body as prepared as I can for this baby. I am so excited to give myself shots for the first time in my life, and to take care of myself for the next few months to get ready. The mom really deserves this baby, and I wish she would know how important this is to me. She seems so sad about the babies, which I could never understand because I've never lost babies, but that doesn't really change the way I feel. I got a little discouraged when they were talking about the possibility of it not working, and how she really doesn't believe in this, but I know for me that this is going to work. There's no reason for it not to! I'm totally giving birth to twins :)
It's crazy to think about maybe, but I want to know what I will end up having! They will implant 2 embryos, and they will both be fertilized so I could have twins! I would love to carry twins. I think it would make the experience that much more exciting. If it's not twins and I am only having one baby, I think I would want to have another boy. "It"s not my baby, but it is a baby that will belong to a friend of mine and a friend of my mothers. I loved carrying a boy and I would love to give them a baby boy to always be my friend. The surrogate mom told me they don't have a godmother in their culture, and they would consider me a godmother to their child. That made me very happy. They are so scared this isn't going to work, and I am so optimistic. There will be 2 fertilized embryos, so I think I will have twins!! If it's a girl, I think it will be exciting for me because I already had a boy. It would be fun to have a girl so I could have another little mini friend to snuggle with when I see her. I know this is going to work. There's no reason for it not to. I'm healthy, I've been eating more and walking more and getting myself ready, and I have at least another month or 2 till I will be having the transfer done. That gives me all that time to gain weight, take my prenatals, and get my body as prepared as I can for this baby. I am so excited to give myself shots for the first time in my life, and to take care of myself for the next few months to get ready. The mom really deserves this baby, and I wish she would know how important this is to me. She seems so sad about the babies, which I could never understand because I've never lost babies, but that doesn't really change the way I feel. I got a little discouraged when they were talking about the possibility of it not working, and how she really doesn't believe in this, but I know for me that this is going to work. There's no reason for it not to! I'm totally giving birth to twins :)
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Welcome to blogspot!
4.20.12
Where do I start!? I am embarking on the most incredible journey. I get to be a permanent incubator, and a home for 9 months for a little baby boy or girl and get to help a family get what they deserve! I get to focus on the well-being of a soon to be little angel baby.
My process started back in November of 2011. I have a beautiful baby boy named Dexter that was the best gift to ever be given to me. My best friend gave her baby up for adoption, and found the most wonderful deserving family that let her do an open adoption. She gets to see little Ellie every week, and is a big part of this family. This made me think, if God is going to give me the best gift in the world when I wasn't expecting it, why can't I help a family get this gift too, when they are fighting for a baby of their own.
I started researching in Minnesota and found an agency to help me out and give me wonderful information to really get me motivated and ready to do this. When I decided to tell my mom, she placed a family in my hands. My mom is a Montessori preschool teacher and taught a boy named Ricky when he was little. She became good friends with the parents and last year they decided that they wanted to open their own Montessori school and have my mom be their head teacher- such a blessing for them and an even bigger blessing for my mom. After talking to my mom about becoming a surrogate, she sent me a text saying "my boss has been looking, will you do it for her?" And it went from there. I spoke with them over the phone and they sounded so wonderful! And knowing so much about them through my mom, and how much they care about my mom, this was a no-brainer. I went home to Boston to visit for Christmas and met them and it clicked. I had found my family! :)
Since Christmas and picking the family, this had turned into a kind of waiting game. Waiting to pick lawyers and agencies, waiting for my body to catch up so we could all get started! My body was finally ready so we booked my sonohistogram appointment and my flight and I was finally on my way. I learned a lot this last week. I learned a lot of course about what I will be doing with medications and about the transfer, but moreover I learned about the family and even more about myself. The most obvious benefit for being a surrogate is that this deserving family gets their little child that they have been desiring so much. But this experience is just as much rewarding for me as it is for them. I don't get a new little baby when I am finished, but this angel is saving my life too. I had the most amazing pregnancy with my son. I was healthy and focused on making sure I keep my baby. I was 20 pounds under weight when I got pregnant, so my goal was to do every healthy thing possible to make it to the 2nd trimester and keep my baby safe. I am so excited to be on a strict schedule again! Eating healthy, working out, living healthy, and doing everything I can to keep this little angel safe. This mom has such a desire to be a new mommy again. She is so loving and cares about so many people, and I can't wait to give her this wonderful gift.
4.21.12
I signed my retainer agreement with my lawyer yesterday! This is the first step with the lawyer. He is going over the standard contract with the surrogate family's lawyer, and will be contacting me after they come to agreements. Once this is done, the IVF clinic in Boston can send me my package! I am now waiting for the lawyer to get back to me as to when him and I can get together to go over our entire contract. I am so excited to go into his office and get all this squared away! This finally feels like a business deal, like work. I'm having so much fun!
4.23.12
This first post is taking me a long time to finish. I have so much I want to say, but I think I will post when I am done here. I am waiting patiently (trying to be patient) to hear back from my lawyer to go on to the next step. He is finishing up contracts with the surrogate family and their lawyer, and then is writing up a full contract for me, and I will get to go into his office and meet him and go over the contract in person! I think one of the best parts of going to Boston last week was meeting all my doctors that I will be working with over the next few months. Jean is so great, my main contact in the fertility office. She is SO sweet and so on top of things. She doesn't email, but she picks up her phone whenever I call! It's great! I am not used to doctors that are there when you need them! And Dr Hardy is so wonderful too, the head doctor. Everyone in the office is so on top of things, and you can tell they have a lot of experience with what they do. It gives me a lot of confidence working with a clinic like this. Everyone is so friendly too! They are so willing to help. Dr Hardy even told me that if I don't understand something that they tell me I HAVE to call, even 10 PM at night, he'll have his beeper on him! What a blessing! They answered all my questions, they have a website to help me learn everything I have to do step-by-step, and they are only a phone call away!
I hope I can find an OB out here like this too. I liked using midwives when I had Dexter. The office I went through had 7 midwives and 2 doctors, and I worked with all of them, so that whenever I went into labor I would know someone working. But since this is a special situation, I kind of want to work with an individual, so they can be more involved with what's going on. We'll see what happens, I'm going to start asking around to my friends out here to see what they have used.
Where do I start!? I am embarking on the most incredible journey. I get to be a permanent incubator, and a home for 9 months for a little baby boy or girl and get to help a family get what they deserve! I get to focus on the well-being of a soon to be little angel baby.
My process started back in November of 2011. I have a beautiful baby boy named Dexter that was the best gift to ever be given to me. My best friend gave her baby up for adoption, and found the most wonderful deserving family that let her do an open adoption. She gets to see little Ellie every week, and is a big part of this family. This made me think, if God is going to give me the best gift in the world when I wasn't expecting it, why can't I help a family get this gift too, when they are fighting for a baby of their own.
I started researching in Minnesota and found an agency to help me out and give me wonderful information to really get me motivated and ready to do this. When I decided to tell my mom, she placed a family in my hands. My mom is a Montessori preschool teacher and taught a boy named Ricky when he was little. She became good friends with the parents and last year they decided that they wanted to open their own Montessori school and have my mom be their head teacher- such a blessing for them and an even bigger blessing for my mom. After talking to my mom about becoming a surrogate, she sent me a text saying "my boss has been looking, will you do it for her?" And it went from there. I spoke with them over the phone and they sounded so wonderful! And knowing so much about them through my mom, and how much they care about my mom, this was a no-brainer. I went home to Boston to visit for Christmas and met them and it clicked. I had found my family! :)
Since Christmas and picking the family, this had turned into a kind of waiting game. Waiting to pick lawyers and agencies, waiting for my body to catch up so we could all get started! My body was finally ready so we booked my sonohistogram appointment and my flight and I was finally on my way. I learned a lot this last week. I learned a lot of course about what I will be doing with medications and about the transfer, but moreover I learned about the family and even more about myself. The most obvious benefit for being a surrogate is that this deserving family gets their little child that they have been desiring so much. But this experience is just as much rewarding for me as it is for them. I don't get a new little baby when I am finished, but this angel is saving my life too. I had the most amazing pregnancy with my son. I was healthy and focused on making sure I keep my baby. I was 20 pounds under weight when I got pregnant, so my goal was to do every healthy thing possible to make it to the 2nd trimester and keep my baby safe. I am so excited to be on a strict schedule again! Eating healthy, working out, living healthy, and doing everything I can to keep this little angel safe. This mom has such a desire to be a new mommy again. She is so loving and cares about so many people, and I can't wait to give her this wonderful gift.
4.21.12
I signed my retainer agreement with my lawyer yesterday! This is the first step with the lawyer. He is going over the standard contract with the surrogate family's lawyer, and will be contacting me after they come to agreements. Once this is done, the IVF clinic in Boston can send me my package! I am now waiting for the lawyer to get back to me as to when him and I can get together to go over our entire contract. I am so excited to go into his office and get all this squared away! This finally feels like a business deal, like work. I'm having so much fun!
4.23.12
This first post is taking me a long time to finish. I have so much I want to say, but I think I will post when I am done here. I am waiting patiently (trying to be patient) to hear back from my lawyer to go on to the next step. He is finishing up contracts with the surrogate family and their lawyer, and then is writing up a full contract for me, and I will get to go into his office and meet him and go over the contract in person! I think one of the best parts of going to Boston last week was meeting all my doctors that I will be working with over the next few months. Jean is so great, my main contact in the fertility office. She is SO sweet and so on top of things. She doesn't email, but she picks up her phone whenever I call! It's great! I am not used to doctors that are there when you need them! And Dr Hardy is so wonderful too, the head doctor. Everyone in the office is so on top of things, and you can tell they have a lot of experience with what they do. It gives me a lot of confidence working with a clinic like this. Everyone is so friendly too! They are so willing to help. Dr Hardy even told me that if I don't understand something that they tell me I HAVE to call, even 10 PM at night, he'll have his beeper on him! What a blessing! They answered all my questions, they have a website to help me learn everything I have to do step-by-step, and they are only a phone call away!
I hope I can find an OB out here like this too. I liked using midwives when I had Dexter. The office I went through had 7 midwives and 2 doctors, and I worked with all of them, so that whenever I went into labor I would know someone working. But since this is a special situation, I kind of want to work with an individual, so they can be more involved with what's going on. We'll see what happens, I'm going to start asking around to my friends out here to see what they have used.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)